Dear Straight Talk: I’m writing in response to Farren and Lennon who said that this generation of teens are overly dramatic and constantly need attention. It’s true. It seems like to fit in everyone’s got to have a “story” or a “fabricated personality” so they can be “interesting”. You don’t find too many people that don’t have some kind of story to set them apart. It’s almost like you have to invent a personality because there is this fear that if you aren’t more interesting and fascinating than the next person there will be no attention coming your way. It’s like we are starving for something.
Even the so-called losers are, in their own way, trying to be cool, becoming outcasts or rebellious so they can stand out. Whether you do it by fitting in or rebelling, it’s all for the same goal of getting noticed. It’s like we’re fighting a war to get noticed, struggling against other people to stand out more. It’s exhausting! Even though I see what’s going on, I’m not always strong enough to go against the grain and I find myself doing the “drama thing” some of the time, too, because without it you’re just going to be another flower on the wallpaper. I don’t know what the alternative is, but the current situation isn’t healthy. It’s frustrating because I’m complaining about my generation, yet I am part of the problem, too. We all see it but we keep doing it. It’s aggravating to see something that needs fixing but you can’t fix it.—Ashley, 15
Dear Ashley: Each generation is a product of its surroundings. I will say again that considering what this generation has to deal with compared to other generations, you are doing as well as anyone could. There is nothing inherently wrong with you. In fact, this generation has a degree of inner awareness and psychological sensitivity that is unsurpassed for a group of teenagers.
I believe the need for attention you describe is due mainly to the influence of the entertainment industry. Since television and movies began, the industry has fixated on depicting juveniles as miniature adults, setting them in extraordinary situations and giving them the looks, clothing, cleverness, humor, courage and confidence of the most brilliant adults. Of course, they’re not real, but are only acting the scripts that creative adults in the entertainment industry have written for them. But you have grown up with these fabricated TV and movie youths as your role models, you have watched and been fascinated by them your whole life and it’s only natural that you, as a generation, would think this how young people are supposed to be. It’s called programming. Your generation has been programmed to think this is how kids are. And if you’re not that way, you think something’s wrong with you. No wonder it’s exhausting. Earlier generations had no such expectations for themselves. Children and teens were not expected to be extraordinary and fascinating. Confidence and courage and witty phrases came with age and life experience.
Unfortunately, adults are susceptible to programming, too, and it seems that adults now also consider it the norm for kids act this way. It’s like we all drank from an enchanted cup and nobody can even remember that we’ve been put under a spell.
It’s this deep spell that makes it hard for you to change anything. The fact that you even see the problem is remarkable. And from my interviews with teens, it’s clear that many of you see it. Keep your eye on it, stay aware, wean yourself off the media as much as possible—and perhaps resolve to do so for the next generation. You’ll be parents yourself before too long and this could be your contribution to bring us out of the spell by raising the next generation of children media-free. Can you imagine? I wonder if anybody can.
——-
