DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Like many girls our age, my sister and I wanted our nipples and navel pierced. We’re under 18 and knew our prudish mom wouldn’t consent, so we did it on the black market. Our mom normally knocks before entering our room, so we thought we could hide the evidence. However, she walked in without warning and came unglued. She’s grounded us for a month and forbidden us to wear body jewelry. She says she’s going to make us remove our tops randomly to make sure we are obeying. We think this is a gross invasion of privacy but she disagrees. We would like the panel’s opinion. Thank you. — LeeAnne, Sacramento, Calif.
Editor’s Note: This column reminds me of the column we did on drug testing (NOV 24, 2010), where 90 percent of the panelists agreed (including drug-using panelists) that random drug testing by parents was warranted for cause. Young people really do want to be called on their stuff. And if it not from their parents, who will do it?
I was glad Akasha called attention to the fact that piercings can interrupt the flow of chi through the energy meridians known to Chinese medicine. Many practitioners of acupuncture feel that piercings in the wrong places can trigger health imbalances.
Comments
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My younger sister who is only 15 had her nipples and navel pierced and wears body jewelry there. When she first had it done, she took off her top to proudly display it to me when we were alone in our room. When I told her the truth, that it made her look slutty, she was very hurt and upset. She said that most of the girls at the sleepovers and slumber parties she goes to have had this done and show off their body jewelry and she felt left out and wanted to fit in. I think it’s very sad if they have nothing better to do than expose their boobs and nipple jewelry to each other! My friends and I certainly do not do this. She said that there’s one girl who has actually had her vagina pierced and wears jewelry there! OUCH! Our mom would have a major, major cow if she found out about this and my sister would be in huge trouble. I know that in recent Straight Talk columns everyone was in agreement that you should tell someone if your sister or a friend is anorexic, a cutter, or threatening suicide. However, I’m not sure that this comes under the category of something that you should report to your parents. Our mom doesn’t see her naked like I do since we share a room, so she isn’t likely to find out unless I tell her. As slutty and stupid as I think this is, I’m inclined to let it be her business as it’s not life threatening like these other things are and does me no harm.
Monica
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Do be so sure that this isn’t harmful. My sister got a cheap black market piercing of her nipples and navel and got what she paid for. She got a really bad infection from it in her left nipple. It really scared me when she showed it to me in our room and asked me what she should do. Her nipple and the lower part of her boob turned a very dark redish-black color and was very painful. She ended up having to tell our mom anyway so that she could get medical attention. They gave her antibiotics and it got better, but the doctor said that this type of infection can be very dangerous. I had tried to talk her out of it, but against my better judgment I agreed not to tell our mom when she insisted on going through with it. But now I wish I had told our mom and put a stop to it before it came to this.
M.K.
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My sister and I wear nipple and navel jewelry and so do many of our friends and we think it’s cool. Our mom has no problem with it and signed the consent to have it done at a licensed provider. However, we learned the hard way that you have to be discrete about who sees it. We share our room with our 10 year old stepsister when she stays with us. It didn’t occur to us that we needed to remove the jewelry when she was here and she saw it when we were nude in the bedroom. She was totally fascinated with it so we didn’t see a problem. But she told her mom about it and said she wants to wear it as soon as she has breasts. Her mom was furious that we “exposed” her to something like this and read our mom and stepdad the riot act for letting this happen and even threatened to try to have his visitation rights taken away unless we stop “exposing” her to this. Our stepdad actually seemed to think the whole thing was funny, but he and our mom told us that from now on we can’t wear it in front of her when she’s sharing our room. It’s only every other weekend, so it’s not that big of a deal, but we still think it’s ridiculous. This is so common these days that she was bound to see it sooner or later.
Leslie
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I can’t understand why anyone would pierce their nipples. First of all, I can’t imagine having someone pierce me in a place like that. Secondly, unless you’re a whore or a real slut, what’s the point? However, my sister and several of my friends have had it done. When my sister first had it done and showed me, I asked her who was she trying to impress? I mean, was she really going to expose her boobs to guys so that they could be impressed by something like this? She said of course not, nobody is going to see her without her top but me and her friends. I really don’t think most girls are impressed by something like this so I just don’t see the point. And even if you’re going to show it to guys, I think they would just think you’re a slut both for exposing yourself and for doing this to yourself. I for one would not be interested in the kind of guys who would be turned on by something like this. But it’s a free country, so if somebody wants to do it, it should be their right.
Julie
