Weekly Column Archives
February, 2012
Son won’t go to sleep before midnight
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I have an ordinary question compared to the topics you cover. How do you get a teenager (age 16) to go to sleep before midnight — so that he wakes up in the morning acting like a human being? (I’m afraid…
January, 2012
Son’s internet romance worries Dad
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: My oldest, age 15, is in a long-term, long-distance relationship with "the one." He is constantly asking to visit her. I have concerns about the level of supervision there (every interaction has involved questionable…
On the first day of Christmas my true love stole for me
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I am writing about my friend. She has a problem with shoplifting, maybe even an addiction. I would like to help her stop before she gets caught because she is over 18 and it will result in a criminal record. I have…
Mom asks: Are my curfew and dating rules too strict?
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: My 17-year-old daughter has a serious almost-18-year-old boyfriend. She says I’m too restrictive. I feel a midnight curfew is reasonable and that she may not go to his home since I don’t know if an adult…
Making a better world, Part II
DEAR READERS: Each New Year I ask the panelists: What bugs you most about the world? How would you make the world better? Last week's “better world” column covered concerns about how digital networking has diminished face-to-face…
December, 2011
Young people lament downside of digital age
DEAR READERS: What bugs you most about the world? How would you make the world better? Every winter, I pose these questions to the panel. This year, technology took a bruising. Real relationships, thinking deeply, embracing boredom, and…
Best party favor: stay sober, keep each other safe
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I attend high school parties but don't usually drink or use drugs. Recently a girl chugged vodka. Everyone except me was drinking so nobody thought much of it. After ten minutes, her limbs went limp and she…
Girl raped while passed out from drinking
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I am helping a friend in my dorm through a terrible experience. She passed out from drinking at a party and was put in a bedroom to sleep it off. She woke up in pain with somebody on top of her. It was like a bad…
Generous Aunt gets no thanks
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Each year I give my niece and nephew an expensive gift of something they want or need. I often include money. If I'm there for the holidays, they say thank you but I have never once received a thank-you letter.…
November, 2011
Dad’s suggestive touching embitters daughter
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I'm 17 and lucky to have an involved dad who believes in his kids. But he finds a way to pat my bottom or touch me closer to my chest than I am comfortable with any boy doing. Because of this, I avoid standing…
Teens ‘n Twenties shopping guide
DEAR READERS: It’s time again for Straight Talk’s shopping list — direct from the source. I’m always hoping Santa will “think outside the box” (literally) and scratch video games,…
Learning warning signs of suicide saves lives
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Regarding last week’s column about the boy who committed suicide, a friend of mine also did lots of increasingly negative drinking, smoking weed and partying.…
Father’s love and courage teaches many
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Twenty-one months ago, my 18-year-old son jumped to his death from the 720-foot-high Foresthill Bridge. He left for school that morning. At lunch, I got a call that…
Should parents restrict access to son’s troubled friend?
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: What should I do? My son is 16 and wants to hang out with someone who is a very bad influence and I don’t know how to go about preventing that. Whenever they spend…
October, 2011
Risks of risqué Halloween dressing
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: You wrote last week about how risqué attire can draw unwanted attention and lead to trouble if a girl is naive or insecure. How does this relate to Halloween? My daughter…
Did girl’s risqué attire contribute to close call?
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: A friend almost got raped. We were at a club and she can be really insecure about guys so she was flirting to the max wearing four-inch heels, short shorts, cleavage…
Cat allergy stirs up pervasive hate
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Please help me stop wanting to do evil things to my stepsister. I’m 15 and she’s 10. Because of her, I had to find a new home for my cat who I love dearly…
This gay-straight sleepover not black and white
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Our daughter is gay/bisexual. We have no problem with that. I have read your gay-straight sleepover columns, but they are focused on friendships. My gay/bi teen wants…
September, 2011
Want to be an alcoholic? Start drinking young
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I still have the photo. I’m at my best friend’s house and her mom and stepdad are serving us whiskey and Coke. I am 15. It was my first alcohol. From that…
Stepbrother’s ‘first time’ an in-house seduction
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I had sex with my stepsister last weekend when we were home alone on a visitation at my dad’s. She’s 17 and I’m 16. She seduced me and was well prepared,…
Pressure-cooker high schools
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Sometimes I think our schools have gone crazy. We expect our kids to get a 4.6 GPA, letter in sports, run student government, play in the orchestra,…
Facebook: It’s amazing who’s looking at your posts!
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: When are kids going to learn that anything posted on the Internet is potentially exposed to the world? As a hiring manager, I am floored by the number of applicants…
August, 2011
Former “cutter” worries about scars
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I’m 18, heading to college, happy to leave high school behind and become my own person. The trouble is I have scars on my arms from cutting when I was younger…
Real-life advice to take to college
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: My daughter starts college next week and I’m wondering what real-life advice the panel and you have for her. I am concerned about hookups, binge-drinking and depression,…
Where do you stand on the f-bomb?
Dear Straight Talk: People in their teens and twenties are telling me that the f-word is used everywhere, on TV, in everyday life, by all ages, including parents around their young children, who then use it in school. They say it doesn’t…
Boy has murderous thoughts toward bully
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I moved here as a freshman. I’m heading into junior year and never made it into the popular crowd. In fact, I’m completely shunned because last year, a completely…
Harry Potter: Hero in a hero-less world
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Harry Potter was such a sensation for so many young people who grew up on the books and then the movies. I would love to hear what Harry Potter meant to them, and if…
July, 2011
Will skinny dipping make you gay?
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: My sister and I like to skinny dip in our pool on hot nights. When friends spend the night we invite them to join us since we’re all girls. Our mom recently remarried…
Dear 16-year-old You, read this column!
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I’m glad I don’t have worse concerns than this, but my daughter is going to Mexico with another family and I’m worried she will cook herself on the…
To kiss or not to kiss?
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I am a 24-year-old man relatively new to dating. It has been my assumption that kissing a woman on a first date is considered “too forward”, but after reading…
Sickest bullies are those who pretend to be friends
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Someone I once considered a good friend has been saying absolutely horrible things behind my back. I overheard her, so I know it’s true. This person is very insecure…
June, 2011
Strip poker sheds clothes, shreds friends
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Last weekend at a birthday slumber party, one of the pushier girls suggested we turn our regular poker game into strip poker. Well, I was the only one who chose not…
Young man’s love is tested
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Please help. I am 17. My girlfriend, “Tina,” is 15. Her mom is really strict and thinks I just want to take advantage of Tina (which I don’t). Last…
Dad wants to understand today’s dating scene
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: My stepdaughter is 17, intelligent, popular and attractive. She attended prom last month with a lot of friends, which is how she always goes out. I’m not aware…
Daughter home from college—where will b.f. sleep?
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: My daughter is a junior in college. She’ll be coming home shortly with her boyfriend who we have not yet met. They do not live together but I’m pretty sure…
College-age panelists weigh in on pornography issue
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: My younger brother is 19, a healthy college student. We are close friends. He confided in me that he is reluctant to date because of recent problems with arousal. He…
May, 2011
Brother watches porn in front of younger sister
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I’m 15. I share a room with my 17-year-old brother because our mom can only afford two bedrooms. We have a computer in our room and I’ve noticed him looking…
Mom shames overweight daughters
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: My sister and I are overweight. Every Saturday, our mom makes us strip naked and weighs us. We find it humiliating and embarrassing to stand there naked and be weighed…
Divorced dad wonders when to tell kids about new flame
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I have been separated/divorced for 15 months. About nine months ago, following a rebound relationship, I met someone I’m serious about. I’m as surprised…
Boys don’t ask for help—but they really need it
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: A friend with daughters referred me to your column. While I enjoy it very much, I would like to see more coverage of male issues. Almost every helpful program is weighted…
April, 2011
A bullying solution that really works
DEAR READERS: If your school could have a superpower, what would it be? If it’s an anti-bullying superpower, you’re in luck. I’d like to shout from the rooftops about the “Safe School Ambassadors”…
Siblings embarrassed about having two moms
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I’m 16 with a 14-year-old sister. Our mom is gay and her partner, “Jenny,” lives with us. We’re products of a marriage when she was young and…
Boy could be suffering from “Facebook depression”
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Maybe I shouldn’t meddle, but my son is an awkward, shy teenager and my brother’s kids are popular. At a recent reunion, a lively conversation ensued about…
“I want my own room” can be selfish
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: My sister and I have to share a room because we get along. Our younger brothers get their own rooms because they constantly fight. We feel that this is unfair. In most…
March, 2011
One sibling doesn’t want to room with other in college
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: My stepsister and I are both seniors and have applied to colleges. We share a room during visitations and where she has always been interested in a close relationship,…
Senseless war against masturbation still rages
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: This sounds like a Seinfeld episode, but my mom came home unexpectedly and caught me masturbating (something I normally do under the covers). She believes sex is immoral…
Parents each want a kid after divorce
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I’m 16 and my sister is 15. We are close friends. Our mom and dad are getting divorced and have agreed that one of us will go with our mom and one with our dad.…
Nipple & navel piercings behind Mom’s back
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Like many girls our age, my sister and I wanted our nipples and navel pierced. We’re under 18 and knew our prudish mom wouldn’t consent, so we did it on…
Dude! What’s up with extreme sports?
DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: If I could ask young people anything, I’d like to know what the fascination is with extreme sports. What is this fixation all about? — Melody, Monterey,…
