Straight Talk For Teens By Teens

I have many friends of both sexes who sleep together and do not have sex. Sure it happens sometimes, but that doesn’t mean all teenagers are sex-crazed. Some teenagers really are JUST friends with the opposite sex and have no intention to sleep with them in the sense you mean. Usually nothing ever happens because the guy is gay or he needs a place to crash and ends up with a good friend who happens to be female. Most of my friends are male and I don’t see the big deal of having a non-sexual relationship with them.

It is different in every situation, but friends of the opposite sex CAN sleep in the same bed together without having sex. Even promiscuous people are not always at fault. This is a very flirtatious generation that most adults don’t understand. If you see your teen flirting with someone don’t automatically assume something is going on.

There are situations where the guys and girls are just friends. But it can be hard to completely stay away from having something sexual creep in. In many cases, we’d be lying to say it’s strictly friends.

I find it offensive that just because we’re teens you assume we are having sex all the time. Could you be any more judgmental? I have quite a few guy friends who I feel totally comfortable sleeping over with — and we’re not having sex, we’re talking! Did you have sex every time you spent the night at a guy friend’s house?

I go camping with my boyfriend and his family, and usually there are eight or nine teenagers spending all day and night with each other. Nothing happens between either friends or couples because parents have said if we are caught doing anything, we all go home and there’s no more camping. But they give us the opportunity to prove that we can be trusted. If parents make the limits clear, and provide strong consequences, the situation is under control.

Males and females sleep together a lot and nothing happens. Co-ed sleeping isn’t so much the problem, it’s the drinking and smoking that needs to be monitored. Yes, sex happens sometimes, but at least when it does, we’re educated. We didn’t do what your generation did! There was so much sex in the 60s and 70s, most of it unprotected. All our STDs come from you guys! When it comes down to it, the sex education we’ve been given brings in a huge amount of safety.

It depends on the kids. They could very likely be just friends and really have nothing going on. It really does happen a lot. However, the fact that there aren’t parents home is a red flag. Not that parental supervision insures that there are no sexual activities, but it’s definitely a mood-killer. Your friend needs to be a bit more realistic and make sure there’s parental supervision. And you need to mind your own business.

Most intelligent, educated, mature teenagers take the movie for what it is and understand that getting pregnant and giving a child up for adoption is not as easy as it is portrayed in the movie, Juno. Of course, teenagers who are insecure, immature, or have a weak sense of identity, may identify with the movie — especially because the main character is super intelligent, beautiful, trendy, and strong. I don’t think it’s so much the movie as the person watching the movie that determines its effect.

The movie, Juno, makes pregnancy a walk in the park. It is, in no way, realistic. Your friends are very brave to be going through with their pregnancies, but perhaps they are not thinking it through.

The whole ‘Juno effect’ thing is ridiculous. This movie hasn’t started anything. Teen pregnancy has been going on forever. I think when girls watch this movie they are in love with the characters, storyline, and soundtrack, not applying it to real life.

When I was in high school, a few girls got pregnant and decided to follow through with the pregnancy — and that was three or four years ago. I also knew a few who got pregnant and decided not to. Ever since the movie came out, teen pregnancy has been highlighted as if it was something new, but it’s not. People are just paying more attention. I don’t think the movie makes it more acceptable to get pregnant, but I do think it makes it more appealing to see a pregnancy through. All movies are unrealistic, but Juno contains grains of truth such as: being pregnant and having a kid is not the end of the world (a depressingly prevalent train of thought); most parents will care about their daughter even if she gets pregnant; and anyone can get pregnant if you’re not careful — even smart, witty, popular kids.

I think the movie’s effect depends on a girl’s personality. Timid or shy girls aren’t going to sleep with a guy just because they are bored, even after watching this movie. But sluttier girls use boys in different ways, and this movie might fit their lifestyle. I loved the movie. When I first saw it with friends, I wasn’t at all thinking about it. Then my mom suggested we watch it together, and the awkwardness of her sitting there made the ‘lights’ go on and I saw how shocking and unrealistic it was. I mean, Juno finds this really cool adoptive family almost effortlessly, her parents don’t get upset, it’s nothing to give up her child, and at school she’s like, okay everybody, deal with it. I could never do that! I would feel so embarrassed walking around school pregnant.

Our generation is so wowed by the thought of sex that everyone gets embarrassed and nobody takes STIs seriously. Almost no teenager is going to give their “potential partner” an honest answer. That is why you always need to use a condom. Or honestly, just don’t have sex.

I was 18 before I had sex, old enough to handle the emotional and physical consequences. I asked my partner about STDs and he assured me he was clean. He’d had previous partners, but I believed him because I was so in love. He didn’t want to be tested and I didn’t push it thinking it would look like I didn’t trust his word and that was all I cared about. I went on birth control, so we didn’t use condoms. Long story short, I contracted HPV, the cancerous kind. Every time I faced an abnormal pap smear, I cried and was depressed for days. Now, I’ve had to tell my new boyfriend of my “contracted disease.” Ask your girlfriend for a test. Don’t doubt her integrity or bring up her past partners, just say that most diseases have “silent” symptoms. Offer to get tested with her — even if you’re sure you’re clean. Never, ever, be lax because you’re worried about your partner’s feelings. Protect yourself. Even from the person you love.

The best time to ask about STDs is when the relationship is taking that step forward. Getting tested together is a good way to make sure everyone is honest. If your partner tests positive for STDs, hold off on having sex, or if it is curable, wait until it is cured, then still use protection. Always use protection.

I ask, straight up, “When was the last time you were tested for STDs?” So what if the question is awkward? To not ask is irresponsible. Your partner could always lie; it is a hard thing to judge. Also, it is very possible they don’t know they have something and are spreading it.