Teens who say ‘no’ to drugs suffer harsh peer criticism
April 30th, 2008DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: I have a gripe. Over the years, I’ve been to tons of parties and seen tons of drug and alcohol use, even from my closest friends whom I respect. Now, at college, the “need to party” is even stronger. I’ve tried pot and I drink sometimes, but my choice has been to not use drugs and I wouldn’t mind if I never drank again. I believe there is more to life than getting high or wasted, yet my peers seem stuck in this lifestyle. And what really gets me is that many truly believe that I haven’t “lived” because I haven’t ingested certain drugs. It’s so hypocritical because I could say the same thing about experiences I’ve had that they haven’t. Yet, I really feel that they feel closer to each other because they’ve had the same drug trip. Why do people judge each other based on how much they party?
Anonymous, 19
Ashley, 20
You are a brave, strong person to be able to stay away from drugs when your friends are bonding with them. I believe that eventually they will respect your decision and maybe even envy you. No drug can give you something you can’t get from life itself.
Johannes, 21
Are you looking for someone to tell you you’re doing the right thing? If your heart says you’re right, don’t be affected by what others think. People ridicule what they don’t know in order to find peace with what they do.
Emily, 15
I admire you for being able to go to parties and not get sucked into the “party scene”. I, too, have made this choice. Being happy much of the time is better than being “high-happy,” which is a temporary escape from pressures and hardships, and when it wears off, people often feel worse. The biggest drug users usually have low self-esteem. They try to be someone they’re not, while hiding who they really are. Have confidence. I can’t tell you how positive an influence people like you are on big partiers. Behind the comments, many are admiring you.
Mariah, 16
I know a lot of kids who drink and do drugs. They do it for the high. They don’t feel closer because of the same “trip.” That’s just an excuse to continue using.
Nicole, 18
My parents raised me to not become addicted to anything. So far, I have not. I do believe drugs open one’s mind and I support experimentation. But, be careful. Drugs are highly addictive and if you lack self control, or didn’t get the right attention when you were young, you could become addicted the very first time.
Lennon, 21
I agree, people are “stuck in this lifestyle.” I’ve only smoked pot a few times but I drink now and then. Alcohol sucks so much out of you: memory, time, income. Then next day, I not only can’t remember everything, but my skin is tight, I’m disrespectful, I snap faster, and everyone seems out to get me. I think drugs should be used ritually, or only at special occasions. When you do something habitually, it loses its significance.
Bird, 17
People judge each other around partying because America is fixated on drugs and alcohol and this, sadly, is the common ground. I’ve done my fair share of experimenting but I have the utmost respect for people like you.
DEAR ANONYMOUS: I’ve heard your complaint before. Teens say they are considered “weird” if they don’t use alcohol or some kind of drug — and to be popular, it is practically a requirement. Rare individuals like you who can mix with the “in” crowd, have fun, and stay clean, are modern superheroes. What you have, everyone wants. Please write and tell us what you think makes you the way you are.
