World of Warcraft is ‘meth’ of video games
Jun 4DEAR STRAIGHT TALK: Since seventh grade, our 17-year-old son has been entrenched in the video game, World of Warcraft. On school days, he plays 4 hours a day, on non-school days, 8 to12 hours. I’m hesitant to forcibly take the game away because he’s so close to legal adulthood and I believe it’s important that he make the choice to moderate or stop himself. His father and I have taken the tactic of “coaching” rather than dictating. I can’t say it’s working — he has lost his social life, lost motivation for other activities, and is flunking his classes — but we wanted him to “fail” in the safe environment of home, hoping he would see the benefit of giving up the game. Unfortunately, he’s good at WoW, which adds to his desire to play because now it’s the only place he feels successful. Any suggestions on how to help my son?
Carmichael, CA
Beau, 18
In moderation, MMO (massive multiplayer online) games like WoW can relieve stress, however they can be extremely addicting. MMOs let you upgrade yourself in ways you can’t in real life. You essentially become your dream self. Your son is surely addicted to that feeling and has adapted to getting his confidence only through the game. I experienced a low-key addiction to an MMO, but after realizing what was happening, I became determined to extend my confidence to real-life situations.
Peter, 20
I’d say: “You live in our house, you abide by our rules, regardless of your age.” If he gets huffy, tell him he’s welcome to rent his own apartment and game all he wants. At the minimum, make him pay game-related costs (high-speed computer, WoW subscription, phone, internet). To do that, he needs a job. And to get a job, he needs passing grades. I used to game non-stop, too, then life got “real” and I quit.
Nicole, 18
I despise this game. I would immediately take away his computer, no exceptions. He is acting like a little boy.
Kendal, 21
You should have enforced moderation in seventh grade. Letting him “fail” at home because it’s “safe” is crippling him. Parents are supposed to be guides in life, not fellow tourists. Statistics show that most successful children grow up in authoritative (note: not authoritarian) households. So, be authoritative and set boundaries. At the same time, give your son positive reinforcement. Don’t ask why he doesn’t have friends, or why he doesn’t talk to so-and-so anymore. These questions make a socially shy person feel even more inadequate and rejected.
Geoff, 22
The online worlds of MMOs are foundational for many young people, and parents need to understand the appeal. As a player, you are living the most explicit way possible: trekking across haunted deserts with your guild, exploring ancient tombs of forgotten races, brewing beers for fellow players, playing an active part in a dynamic economy. In high school I gamed similar hours as your son — yes, I also did ‘extracurriculars’ and made honor role — but I don’t agree that gaming is addictive. I mean, why not play these games in high school when you still can play games? Now I have no time for gaming — instead I enjoy the freedom not possible in high school: real life.
DEAR CARMICHAEL: Don’t get me going. Gaming is highly addicting, just like drugs, alcohol, or gambling. In fact, many gamers consider WoW the “meth” of video games. Some boys like Geoff, Peter, and Beau, can game heavily, maintain balance, and stop on their own. However, countless boys — your son included — cannot. They are flunking school, flunking life. It’s a global problem and the gaming industry spares no expense on propaganda to convince society otherwise. Peter, Nicole, and Kendal offer great ideas on how to intervene. Your son needs you to do it. More panel comments are on the website.
Emily, 15
I seemed to be addicted to The Sims in eighth grade while being home schooled because I had too much time on my hands. But it wasn’t so much of an addiction as a case of losing track of time. I would sit down at the computer saying, “ok only 15 minutes,” and soon enough 4 hours would go by. So I found something else to take up most of my time; a horse. Once I started spending most of my day with my horse, I never played The Sims again. So try to find him something else he is really good at, something that he will feel proud of AND will make him progress in life. If when coaching him away he gets mad or frustrated with you, lay down rules. Not WOW rules such as, “No computer after 10,” or, “Only 1 hour of WOW,” he is too old for those. More rules such as, “Once you are eighteen, we won’t buy you anything other than necessities, so you will need to get a job,” or, “If you are going to be on the internet so much, you will have to pay for it.” Make him have consequences for playing so much.
Ashley, 20
I talked to people I know who were hooked and they said that eventually they just stopped playing because they realized it was sucking their life away. I guess they kind of just got over it… One of the guys I talked to was defending it saying you are still being social, so for some people it may be seen as social, but I certainly don’t see it as a ‘real’ social activity since it is online and not in person. I really don’t have any suggestions for the parents except hopefully it’s just a phase and from what I have seen it normally is just a phase especially for high school kids.
Nicole
i downloaded a ten day free trial of world of warcraft to see what it was all about. i really wanted to know why kids were getting addicted to it so often. what i noticed about the game is that it is a completely different world. a world where there are no bounderies, and the player is in complete control, i imagine that kids play this game because they need to escape from their own lives. bad communication with their parents, no control around the house, lousy grades and things along those lines, i would imagine trigger them to play. and after a while, they become addicted.