Straight Talk For Teens By Teens

You are a brave, strong person to be able to stay away from drugs when your friends are bonding with them. I believe that eventually they will respect your decision and maybe even envy you. No drug can give you something you can’t get from life itself.

Are you looking for someone to tell you you’re doing the right thing? If your heart says you’re right, don’t be affected by what others think. People ridicule what they don’t know in order to find peace with what they do.

I admire you for being able to go to parties and not get sucked into the “party scene”. I, too, have made this choice. Being happy much of the time is better than being “high-happy,” which is a temporary escape from pressures and hardships, and when it wears off, people often feel worse. The biggest drug users usually have low self-esteem. They try to be someone they’re not, while hiding who they really are. Have confidence. I can’t tell you how positive an influence people like you are on big partiers. Behind the comments, many are admiring you.

I know a lot of kids who drink and do drugs. They do it for the high. They don’t feel closer because of the same “trip.” That’s just an excuse to continue using.

My parents raised me to not become addicted to anything. So far, I have not. I do believe drugs open one’s mind and I support experimentation. But, be careful. Drugs are highly addictive and if you lack self control, or didn’t get the right attention when you were young, you could become addicted the very first time.

I agree, people are “stuck in this lifestyle.” I’ve only smoked pot a few times but I drink now and then. Alcohol sucks so much out of you: memory, time, income. Then next day, I not only can’t remember everything, but my skin is tight, I’m disrespectful, I snap faster, and everyone seems out to get me. I think drugs should be used ritually, or only at special occasions. When you do something habitually, it loses its significance.

People judge each other around partying because America is fixated on drugs and alcohol and this, sadly, is the common ground. I’ve done my fair share of experimenting but I have the utmost respect for people like you.

First of all, no one “makes” you do anything, you do that all on your own. Secondly, why should anyone give you “love and respect” if you don’t love and respect yourself? Many people see emos as self-pitying whiners with no extraordinary problems who are ungrateful for the life they are given. They wallow in misery because they want attention and enjoy feeling sorry for themselves. That may be an unfair generalization, but a cultural movement that glorifies cutting and other self-destructive behaviors does not deserve respect.

Regardless of your problems, if you’re cutting as a solution it will bring you negative attention. I don’t make fun of people who cut. I talk to them about it, and it seems to make them feel better. Next time you feel put down or unloved, talk to someone, focus on what you are grateful for.

Being emo is all for attention, and that’s what you’re getting. Being emo is feeling sorry for yourself, and that’s what you’re creating. What we think and feel we create in our life. Hate crimes should not be tolerated, but emos bring it on themselves. You need to find an outlet so you can happy again.

Your complaint about emos getting beat up and ridiculed goes for every group of stereotyped individuals. Some people lash out at those they don’t understand. They are just ignorant. Regardless, if you are “doing things to yourself that you don’t want to do” you can’t really blame anyone else.

People diss you because it upsets you and they get amusement from that. Don’t take it personally. People pick on others when they see something they resent in themselves.

Emos already feel bad about themselves and I agree that dissing them makes the situation worse. Many emos come from wealthy families with big shoes to fill. A natural response is to rebel and/or become depressed. But the way emos do it is too radical to accept. Another reason people abuse emos is because (except for their music and writing) they are quiet. Like the nerd in the corner, they keep their verbal thoughts to themselves. One’s bark is bigger than one’s bite, and with no bark, one is more likely to get beat up. I wish parents would talk more with their kids. I, too, become depressed when I’m stressed, and talking with my mom totally lightens my emotional load.

Walking in on a parent is difficult enough, but you’re also dealing with the fact that your mother has re-identified her sexuality. There are gay people who falsely stay in a heterosexual relationship their whole lives. To know if this is your mother’s story, talk to her or write her a letter asking every possible question. She owes you honest answers. Keep in mind this is your mother’s choice. Though it does affect you, it isn’t you.

The fact that your mother is a lesbian obviously disturbs you. If you don’t feel comfortable at her house, don’t force it. Eventually, though, you’ll have to come to terms with the fact that she loves this woman. If she is happy all you can do is love and support her as her daughter.

I’m for keeping a family together, but this wouldn’t work for me either. I would respect my mother’s decision, but I would move in with my dad. I wouldn’t be around that type of influence — and it is an influence. People think it’s not, but nonsmokers who hang with smokers tend to start smoking, thin people who hang with obese people tend to start overeating. These are facts. It is amazing if you don’t get influenced by who you are around. By the time I’m a parent, I want my act cleaned up.

I’ve never had a problem with gays or lesbians, but I don’t know how I would react if it was my own mother. If you can talk to her, do it. Or talk to someone else. People are quite tolerant these days and your real friends will support you.

There is nothing wrong with same-sex marriages. Accept your mom’s decision. Be happy that she is finally true to herself.

It’s weird when parents get divorced and go gay or lesbian. It seems like you’d figure this out before you married a member of the opposite sex. If this happened with my mom, my brain would explode.