Archive for October, 2004
October 27th, 2004
Dear Straight Talk: My daughter is 18 with a lovely, slim figure (34A) and she’s obsessed with having her breasts enhanced and has begun saving money for it. It seems shallow to me and I’d like to know how your teens feel about it, both male and female viewpoints.—What happened to “Small is Beautiful”?
Dear What happened?: Of women in the media, more than 90 percent are “supersized”. This kind of “exposure” makes it hard for men and women alike to avoid a feeling of lack when it comes to natural breasts. So, now what? Do we all run to the plastic surgeon like it’s the new orthodontia? I say that, combined with overall vitality, the sexiest part of a woman is, and always has been, her mind. Here’s what two of the teens have to say:
From Amy, 17: I fit your daughter’s description and it never occurred to me to be anything but happy with the body God gave me. I suggest your daughter wear a padded bra until she knows herself better. It is important to accept yourself as you are before rushing into cosmetic surgery for the wrong reasons.
From Jason, 19: If I dated a woman with breast enhancements it would make me wonder what type of person she is. I would figure she lacked self-confidence and self-respect. Plus, if someone isn’t going to love you the way you are, why would you want to be with them anyway?
Discuss this column »
October 27th, 2004
Dear Straight Talk: I’m 16 and my step dad “Frank” goes crazy when I talk to my friends on the phone. He recently “rigged” the phone so it wouldn’t work–I know this because I opened the phone up and saw where he had taken a wire off and I fixed it. This made him so mad that the next day he came home and cut the cord with a knife in the middle of my conversation! He wasn’t even drunk. How can I make him see that it’s normal for a girl my age to use the phone for 30 minutes a day. My mom is no help, she always sides with him and my brother never uses the phone. What should do?—Trying to be normal in an abnormal home
Dear Trying to be normal: It sounds like your father is an alcoholic. Trying to reason with an alcoholic—especially one with anger problems—will probably not work. The best solution is to get your own phone, preferably a cell. I also urge you to get a part-time job and keep your grades up. At 16, the best way to stay “normal” in an alcoholic family is to begin steps toward forming your own life, which means making your own money and providing for yourself in ways that esteem you. I also recommend you contact Al Anon at 530-268-4558.
Discuss this column »
October 6th, 2004
Dear Straight Talk: I’m writing in response to the daughter who wanted a tattoo. I’m 25 and I just spent almost 2 years and $6000 having two tattoos removed. It was incredibly painful. I used to think tattoos were cool, but not anymore. It’s hard to imagine how much life will change when you are 17 sitting in a tattoo parlor. By the way, I’m in sales and made $65,000 last year.—Troy M., Folsom, CA
Dear Troy: Congratulations on removing—literally—the obstacles to your success. But wait a minute: Seventeen! What state were you in? Tattoos are illegal in California until age 18. I spoke with Sacramento dermatologist, Dr. Emil Tanghetti, and removal is costly, painful, and lengthy. Here are some facts: Using laser surgery, depending on the size of the tattoo, three to ten removal treatments are required at a cost of $150 to $400 per treatment. It is woefully painful—much more painful than getting the tattoo—and the skin must “rest” two months between treatments. Complete removal is only guaranteed for all-black tattoos.
Discuss this column »
