Become ally to son who is almost a man
April 28th, 2004Dear Straight Talk: I’m afraid my son, who is 17, is hanging out with the wrong crowd and may be getting into trouble. I won’t let him hang out with them, and he hates me for it. I’m almost certain he is sneaking behind my back and seeing this crowd anyway. It is ruining our relationship and we are always angry with each other. What should I do?—Broken hearted
Dear Heart: Your son is 17, almost a man, and as you’ve noted, he’s going to operate behind you back if necessary to do what he wants. The best approach is to become an ally to your son. It is time to set aside your ideas of how you want him to be and find out who he is in his own right. Make yourself available by consistently setting time aside to talk and learn about him. If you need to vent your feelings, do so with a friend or counselor prior to talking with your son so you don’t erupt and ruin the opportunity to be there for him.
